Impressions

First impressions matter, and they matter a lot.

• Experts have limited opportunities to influence their audience
• People make judgments about one another in seconds
• A first impression establishes a trajectory in a relationship and momentum
• Once that impression is formed it is hard to change and it lasts a long time

Do your homework before meeting someone new. Prepare 2-3 talking points before you are introduced. Talking points should showcase your expertise, demonstrate strong perception of context, and show that you can discriminate between what matters and what does not.

• What is this person's risk?
• What does this person care about?
• How does your knowledge and skill help them?
• What do they need from you?

Ideally the points will come up organically during the discussion, but if you get to the end of the conversation, and they haven’t emerged you might say something like, "Before we leave, there are few things I want to make sure I mention."

It is normal to be nervous when meeting new people but you don't want your anxiety to show. Your body language should be confident and comfortable.

• Consider power posing in advance
• Take long strides
• Head up, chest out, and hands open. (Don't stare at the ground)
• Lean forward and watch the conversation
• Turn on your camera, but don't scowl

Record yourself. Become familiar with how you look and sound. Make adjustments until you like what you see and hear.

Know what you are good at (the domain of your expertise), and prepare evidence of your expertise. What objective measures can you point to as evidence of your mastery?

• Comment about the objective strengths of your expert colleagues
• Pay attention to the compliments of your colleagues
• Don't toot your own horn. Present evidence that toots it for you

Find genuine connections. They don't need to be profound or breathtaking, they just need to create a sense of commonality.

• Find a common interest
• Look for clues about devotion
• Don't discount small talk, it matters

You are not trying to make a good impression with your vast knowledge. That approach is a mistake. Your aim is not to "wow and dazzle." Rather, you should create a conversation that is memorable and meaningful.

• The better you make the other person feel, the more they’ll be inclined to have a positive impression of you
• People love to talk about themselves so ask thoughtful, open-ended questions
• Show genuine interest in their expertise

Even when the conversation is over, your job is not finished. Follow up on any commitments. To ensure your first impression sticks, it’s wise to write a personalized note, reach out on LinkedIn, etc. You want to show that your conversation had an impact on you, which in turn makes an impact on them.